Sunday, February 20, 2011

CAPITOL POLICE


 

No this picture is not from the 1940's Nazi check-point in Warsaw, it's in the paranoid capital of the free world Washington DC. Capitol Police is slowly becoming one of the worthless police force in the country, talking about wasting tax payer's money. These days they sank to a new low that their new job description is to pull over and harass every other cab driver in Capitol Hill for no apparent reason  because they ain't got shit to do. All they good at is to stare at congressional intern chic's asses all day long or sit in their police cruisers on Independence Avenue with their thumbs deep in their butts.

If you drive through Capitol Hill and Union Station, there are more cops than regular people. The overreaction to 9-11 left these surplus cops with nothing to do but intimidate law abiding retards like DC cabdrivers. 9-11 happened because of these different bureaucratic law-enforcement agencies failed to share information, and those towel-head motherfuckers got real real lucky!

"Who are you calling towel head? Nigger! I have bunch of nephews that drive cabs in DC and I will make sure they take care of your ass! You're dead Mad Cabbie, you're DEAD! By the way, is Ben's Chili Bowl still around? Way back in the days I had me a nice half smoke with chili and cheese that was dope. I have to go now Mad, one of those Predator drones is buzzing over my cave.

Yours truly,

Osama Bin Laden."

Relax Osama, I have a bunch of towel-head friends liked Ahmed, Hassan and Abdala and they all love me. I didn't know that Osama Bin laden used to roll at Ben's Chili Bowl in DC? I am sorry I got sidetracked by brother Osama!

As far as I know, the roll of Capitol Police is to guard congress folks and all the buildings, not regulating the city taxi code. If some real shit goes down at Congress building, good luck if you counting on Capitol Police! They will be the ones hiding behind the interns. I checked their website and found this....  

"The moment of transformation… when you slip into the uniform… put on the badge… and join our elite ranks, you’ll feel it. This is the moment you truly become a part of the dedication, the pride, and the legacy that makes the United States Capitol Police a force like no other."

A force like no other? A force like no other? I have bunch of friends who are DC cops and they address Capitol Police as "federal mall-cops" so please stop that "a force like no other" bullshit!


"Mad Cabbie, this is Captain Dick Shorty from the United States Capitol Police, we have traced this blog and we know that you are the driver of Diamond Cab #3514. I will make sure you pay for all this, bitch! You better not step a foot in Capitol Hill anymore! While I got you here Mad, is there a way you can hook me up with the one legged hooker?


I got to go now,


Please don't forget the homeless,


Mad Cabbie.

*The writer has a 4th grade education from DC public school systems!





13 comments:

Anonymous said...

"Yours truly......Osama Bin Laden"

That's funny Cabbie, very funny.

Anonymous said...

That picture is scary and sad at the same time. It kind of reminds me of the soldiers carrying Kalashinkovs who would come to people's house and turn it upside down when ever they felt like it, back in the day in Communist Ethiopia. It is not something that I ever expected to see in the free world.

Moi

Anonymous said...

Just the other night I was pulled over for no reason by capitol police at 1st & D NE. When I asked politely of the reason I was pulled over for, he ignored me and asked for my id, driver's license and manifest. He wasted my time by ignoring me and chatting with his buddy. After ten minutes he came back and said pretty much to get lost. You call that the finest force?

Diamond driver.

Mad Cabbie said...

I don't know how I came up with that? I don't think Osama been in the States, do you?

Moi, I know Ethiopia went through a lot during the Mangestu era. Even though not as bad we had tough Bush years as well.

I feel your pain Diamond driver, that's what happens when you give high school grads too much power!

brokemoto said...

**Cue up David Peel and the Lower East Side**

It has long been known that the Capitol Oinkers hate cab drivers.

There is a sign at Independence Ave @ First St. S.E. that does not allow you to turn left from eastbound Independence Avenue onto First St in the rush hours. The sign says at the bottom 'EXCEPT BUSSES AND TAXICABS' For years the Capitol Porkers had kept duct tape over 'TAXICABS'. This was totally illegal, as only the Department of Highways and Traffic had the authority to post signs. Even the Metropolitan Police could not alter signs. If the Capitol Oinkers issued you a summons, you could take the photographs of the taped over sign and go fight it. The Hearing Examiner would always rule against you and you would lose in the three step appeal process at #65 K, but once you got it in front of a judge, the judge ruled in your favour every time. It took a threat from D.C. Superior Court to hold Capitol Porkers in automatic contempt for even issuing these summonses to get the Capitol Oinkers to remove the duct tape and keep it off the sign.

Mad Cabbie said...

Phil, I am back on the radio now. I just laughed when I found out who the chief dispatcher is. I guess he is your new boss now uh? And why is he calling drivers with some cheesy ass nick names? It's a good thing I don't work with him, if he tried to call me with a made up nick-name I would bitch slap his ass all away to Asmara. But you never know with Eritreans, Monday they are Arabs, Tuesday they are Italians, Wednsday they are Ethiopians...Make up your mind allready!!!!!

Anonymous said...

What does a capitol police wants to be when he grows up?

"A COP!"

Officer L.

Rou said...

We'd give anything here to have the cops checking taxis randomly, we're plagued with dodgy cloned taxis, its out of control here

Anonymous said...

Great post. I've noticed this, too. I actually asked 'em what was up. Nuthin's up. Just the sky. In my weaker moments, I wish they'd put soap in those guns and turn 'em on the Republicans in Congress.

Cat

Anonymous said...

Mad Cabbie, I am a US Capitol police officer. I think we doing you guys a favor by pulling over all the illegals, but i still think this is a funny bit--with Osama!

Anonymous said...

Mad you are so right about Eritreans. I know a few who have gone from Italians to Arabs, and now to being Ethiopians. It would have been funny to me if they have not hated Ethiopians so much for decades. I do not think there is a single Ethiopian who considers Eritreans to be Ethiopians though, for us the divorce between Ethiopia and Eritrea was finalised in 1992. As the French say it we have said "Bon Voyage!!" when they chose to go solo then.

And we wish them all the best as Africa's youngest country.

Moi

brokemoto said...

It would be wonderful, Occifer Anonymous of the United States Capitol Police, if you actually did pull over the illegals, issue them the summonses and impound their vehicles. Sadly, as do all of the other Enforcement Authorities in the District of Columbia, you focus your 'enforcement efforts' (READ: harrassment) on the legitimate drivers. No Police Force in the District bothers the unlicenced drivers. The Harrassment Inspectors ignore the illegals. The Taxicab Commission issues 'permitting' summonses not to the owners of vehicles who allow the illegal to work, rather to the owners of vehicles that are being road tested by the mechanic after he has completed repairs that require road testing.

I would be delighted if the United States Capitol Police, the Metropolitan Police and the Hack Inspectors actually did pull over the illegals, issue five hundred dollar summonses to owners and drivers both and send the unlicenced driver walking down the street in tears. They could even write the illegal for all of the nitpicking stuff for which they write the legitimate drivers.

This City is screaming poormouth, but they ignore a major source of revenue from the harrassment of illegals. They could get one-thousand dollars before they start writing the nitpicky stuff. Five hundred to the driver, five hundred to the owner is what is supposed to happen. If the driver does not pay, they could hold the owner responsible for that fine, as well. Do not assert that it can not be done, we are dealing with Democrats, here. The Democrats love to hold responsible everyone EXCEPT the guy who actually done did the deed.

Anonymous said...

Osama's dead, don't need to worry about him.