Tuesday, November 05, 2013

THE HOTTEST NEWS CHICK ABBY HUNTSMAN.

Abby Huntsman



I was at my Mom's joint the other day and this chic was on MSNBC's The Cycle. I was like, "Haba Haba Haba, who is that?" This girl is hot man! Look at those full lips! It turned out that she is the daughter of the once presidential hopeful John Huntsman. By the way, out of all those republican clowns they had on the 2012 republican primary, her dad had a very good chance of beating Barack Obama if have gotten the republican nomination, but that's another story.

Hey Abby, if you are looking for a nice accomplished single guy, you found me! I am a tall, dark and handsome cabdriver from Washington DC. I like reading romantic novels, gardening, bird watching and enjoy world class exotic vacation spots like Kings Dominion and Ocean City to name a few.

If interested, you know where to find me Abby!

Please don't forget the homeless,

Mad Cabbie.

THE NEW DC TAXI DOME LIGHT.

  New ipad with the retina display? $440

New DC Taxi Dome-light? $500

What's wrong with this picture?

Thanks to comrade Ron Linton the supreme commissioner of DC Taxicab commission, DC cabdrivers are being raped by a single dome-light supplier that the commissioner approved of. This Chinese crap is sealed, so if the bulb in one of the dome-light is burned, you have to go to an approved installation place to get it unsealed and replaced at a cost of $25 or more. If the bulb on the information display burns, it could be $50 or more since the LED lights are built on the motherboard.

A simple dome-light that costs $50 can do the same job if wired correctly, and to replace a burned bulb light costs $3, a screwdriver and ten minutes of the drivers time.

Mr. Commissioner, if you reading this post please send the drivers extra KY Jelly because they are being raped dry and that shit hurts man! I am still walking funny!!!

Please don't forget the homeless,

Mad Cabbie.     

Tuesday, October 01, 2013

DC HACK INSPECTORS WANTED

"Where does a DC hack inspector go for lunch money?"

"Union Station cab stand!!!"

That's right, that's were the lunch money is at. It's a very well known fact among cabdrivers that some of these thugs or the so called hack inspectors harass cabbies at Union Station. For minor shit like a missing hubcap they accept as little as $5 lunch money in favor of not giving a citation ticket. Drivers are afraid to speak out because of the potential retaliation. The DC Taxicab Commission is run like a family mafia, that I will describe about those lazy ass incompetent retards in my next blog or so.

When my man Paul Wagner from Fox 5 reported that one of the hack inspectors has a long history of criminal records like assault and armed robbery, I wasn't surprised for a second! I think all the hack inspectors in hand should fill out their job application again. This time truthfully and let's see how many of them will survive after they go through full background check like we the cabdrivers go through every two years.

My crystal ball is telling me that the District of Columbia government will need bunch of new hack inspectors after all said and done. So I suggest Mr Russ Ptacek a reporter from channel 9 for a hack inspector position! He is a hack inspector wannabe who has been harassing cab drivers for some time now in the name of investigative reporting. So Russ, there is going to be an opening pretty soon, go for your dream job man!

"How dare you diss Russ, Mad Cabbie? Russ Ptacek is an Emmy Award winner, serious reporter who came from the journalism capital of the world! Kansas!"  

Emmy Award my ass motherfucker! Every creep on TV has an Emmy, it's like the pee-wee league, everyone wins a trophy! I know a guy who works in the boiler room at channel 9 who has won it three times man!

The District of Columbia should require a full background check and a college degree to all law enforcement personnel including hack inspectors.

"College degree don't mean shit Mad Cabbie, look at yourself! Shady ass college educated cabdriver! What's wrong with my GED? All I do is pull over these sand niggers and write tickets all day long! Why do I need a degree in physics to be a DC hack inspector?"

That's not funny motherfucker, my degree in mathematics is in use to help me give the correct amount of change to my passengers!

Look, there are all kind of retards running around with college degrees like myself, but a college degree at least is a starting point telling the employer that the potential employee made a four year commitment to do something positive instead of doing drive by and armed robberies.

DC cab drivers thank defense attorney Shawn Sukumar from the Washington DC law firm Price Benowitz for defending a fellow driver and for exposing this thug hack inspector which we will know the name pretty soon. At the same time, not all the hack inspector are shady, like any other business there are always few bad apples, maybe in this case more than a few. We demand full investigation of the backgrounds of all DC hack inspectors and a complete overhaul of the hiring process as soon as possible.

When I am pulled over by a hack inspector, I don't want to second guess if the inspector is going to rob my ass at gun point, I have plenty of my passengers who do that for a living.

Please don't forget the homeless,

Mad Cabbie. 

     

Saturday, September 28, 2013

MAD THE NGO GUY

Hello kiddos, long time no talk......

I was half way around the world for some time. Old classmate of mine threw me a bone and hired me at a well known international NGO and I ended up in Afghanistan. We were working on a water project  in the eastern part of the country. I tell you what, I have accomplished a lot in life, like being the cabdriver of the month two month in a row few years ago...

"Mad Cabbie you are a pathetic looser, is that all you have to show for your college education, driver of the freaken month?"

Listen, don't call me a looser you jackass, you know when the last time they had cabdriver of the month two months in a row at Diamond Cab? It was in 1942 by a driver called Billy St. Jack! So besides being in the same league with hall of famer like Billy, the water project in Afghanistan tops the list. It was a hell of an experience, even though I was shitting in my pants every time I heard a loud noise. I grew my beard like my college Rasputin days to blend in, locals loved me and some Talibans were high fiving me, they were like "Yo nigger, what's up with the skid-marks in your pants, we're not going to hurt you..."

Look,, this is not a water project blog, I would like to go in details and write some funny experiences but I don't want to jeopardize of being hired again if I have that opportunity.

There is a lot of shit I need to get to about our DC cab business..... Ron Linton, Mary Cheh, Mayor Gray, Russ Ptacek, DC hack inspectors, DC inspection station, Uber.......All of these jackasses better get ready!

Please don't forget the homeless,

Mad Cabbie.