Sunday, December 02, 2007


I think the most useless and good money wasted for institution on this planet has to be the Chevy Chase Police Department in Montgomery county Maryland. The police department covers about a whopping two square mile of real estate which half of it is the Chevy Chase country Club. I understand that the average cost of a house is well over a million dollars mostly occupied by middle aged rich farts. Trust me there is no drive by shootings in this neighborhood, the cops spend most of their time staring at their radar guns and scratching their fat asses on Connecticut Avenue between East-West Highway and the Chevy Chase Circle by the DC line and harass daily commuters especially DC cabs.

You see, DC cabs are easy targets for cops these days especially after 9-11, because of the intense background check and shit we go through they know that we are not a danger to their safety when they pull us over. Back in the days cabbies used to have an impressive criminal resume, I could bitch slap my passenger in the morning and go to the DC Taxicab Commission the same afternoon and get my taxi license renewed and get a free lolly-pop on my way out with no problem, and that was the good old days. These days they even count the skid marks in my pants before they give me my Taxi-ID! So cabbies are no threat to cops and everyone knows it except this Chevy Chase cop who needed to have two more cruisers to attend my ass.

I got pulled over on Connecticut avenue near Bradley Blvd by a Chevy Chase police cruiser around five this morning while I was driving back home. It was still dark and I was tired and eager to hit the sack but luck wasn't on my side. After I handed my driver's license to a very short police officer I made a quick phone call to my friend Officer L who is a DC cop and was also on duty at the time.

MC: I got pulled over on Connecticut avenue
OL: By one of our guys?
MC: No, on the Maryland side
OL: Why would they pull you over? I know you don't speed, you drive like my grandfather! Do you have a passenger?
MC: No I don't, I was heading home.
OL: Those motherfuckers are like mall guards! so give them some respect and make them feel good, you probably have a blown headlight or something. Just chill! Call me if they lock your ass up, I have to go now!

The next thing I know there were three cruisers behind me and the midget came back to ask me if I am the owner of the cab. Even though the name on my registration and my license was a match the idiot still wanted to know if I was the owner! politely I said yes and gave him my insurance information. After a good fifteen minutes the motherfucker came back with a warning ticket for a stupid non operating rear tag lights (My tag plate has two bulbs and only one wasn't working! what a joke!) and I was on my way.

I don't understand why Montgomery County Police Department which is a fine real police department can't handle Chevy Chase instead of wasting extra money on those idiots? Can some one tell me why and how these neighborhood Rent-a-Cop operation works?

Please don't forget the homeless,

Mad Cabbie.


june in florida said...

Bored rent-a-cops are the worst, got nuttin better to do.

Eryn said...

Hee hee. Tell us how you really feel, Mad. :-)

Peggy said...

Perhaps it was another case of DWB, Driving While Black. It causes more pull-overs than we white folks would think. My ex-husband used to get pulled over 100% more often than I ever was.

Anonymous said...

mad, please accept my sympathy. i've gotten 2 speeding tickets in my long life: BOTH for going LESS THAN 20 mph (in the 15 mph zone which was the town in iowa where i worked). When Reagan (I think it was) became president, all of a sudden the states got extra money to beef up their "community" police forces. as a result, small towns in the boondocks found themselves with more cops than they needed. so the city fathers (and some mothers) hounded the fuzz to write more tickets to give them something to do and add some cash to the till at the same time. the good cops in townwhereiworked found an easy target: housewives on their way to work. we were almost always in a hurry ("you were going 18 mph in a 15 mph zone, ma'am"), and virtually none of us had criminal records so we weren't scary. you'd see these cops pulling over housewives (hey...they were driving station wagons with "baby on board" signs in the back windows) every day of the week, every month in the year. i only saw them pull over one man, a truck driver, in the 10 years i worked there. and...wait for it...he ws black.

Anonymous said...

hey, that was me...i clicked "anonymous" and shazam! the comment was printed!

peggy's mom, former iowa resident...who else?

Red said...

I hate that stretch of road there and travel it every day. I rarely see those guys and didn't even see them when some bitch slammed into me right across the street from their station.

Red said...

Only two more weeks of travelling that road now. I done got me a new job! Wahoo!

DC Cab Rider said...

A friend of mine lives in CChase (and no, she's not an old rich fart, just someone whose parents lived their ages ago & she inherited the house). Anyhow, she gets stopped on Conn. for speeding at a spot where the speed limit is really low.

Is that the same guys doing it?

Mad Cabbie said...

June I am sure you came across those kind of idiots during your hacking days!

Eryn, To be honest I felt like shit but I don't let shit like that suck out the energy out of me anymore...I was in and out of a coma for three days and fortunately I am back for a reason!

Peggy DWB happens a lot around here but that's the way it is for now, what can I say? Hopefully the next generation will have it better!

Peggy's mom, I knew you had a criminal rap sheet! You and all your speeding tickets...and by the way what the hell was that black dude doing in a small Iowa town?

Those idiots don't operate during rush hours unless you do something real stupid...I am happy that you found a new job that hopefully is not 16 miles from home.
P.S they don't usually pull over a green-eyed redhead with big boobs:-

DCCR, what else are they going to do? What could possibly go wrong in Chevy Chase? Unless you and your friend in Chevy Chase throw some wild ass parties in her basement and disturb the neighborhood!

Red said...

I may not get pulled over by CC police but they don't help either.

I did, however, get pulled over by the Pentagon cops because they forgot what year it was and thought my tags were expired. Oye!