Thursday, September 23, 2010


Didn't I tell you last night that I will be rolling with dough? I was right man! I didn't have time to hit that Indian food joint because as soon I drove out of my apartment, BINGO! The first fare, gay couple who wanted to go to Pentagon City, and by the time I slowed down it was close to mid-night and it was too late for me to eat so I settled for a stupid apple that I brought from home.

I started to get real busy again around one o'clock. There are about 12,000 cardiovascular specialist from all over the world in Washington DC for a convention and business was rocking. It might be a good time to have a heart attack for the next few days in Washington, because every bum you see at corner is a cardiologist. Most of my passengers were Europeans and at one point I thought I was driving a cab in Tel-Aviv or something!

"Mad you idiot, Tel-Aviv is in the middle-east you dump ass! You're just another ignorant American!"

Whatever dude, and please don't interrupt my story please! So around two o'clock Pastor Joe calls me to cover a special operations work for him and I was in no mode for that shit. I didn't want to deal with hookers, Johns, dope dealers or anything of that nature because I was busy stuffing cash in my pocket doing local short trips.

PASTOR: What up Zebra, what's rolling?
MAD: I am hustling man, I am on 19th and Benning! What the fuck you want?
PASTOR: I want you to pick up "Blind man Dan" for me ASAP!
MAD: Fuck no Pastor! I don't want to deal with that freak, besides I am on a roll right now. Why can't you do it?
PASTOR: Stop counting those pennies nigger! This run is an easy C note motherfucker!"
MAD: Listen I am in no mood to drive that blind freak and listen to his conspiracy theories and shit! why don't you call your cracker friend "High Tech Ben"?

To make the long story short I just couldn't say no to the Pastor.

"Blind Man Dan" is a fat white dude in his forties who comes up with all kind of conspiracy theories for every little shit. He thinks Obama is a planted cell made by the Chinese and North Koreans! The story goes when Dan was nine years old an elephant stepped on his ass during an African safari with his parents, and he went blind ever since. He is a trust fund baby, he comes from an extremely wealthy family but works for the Fed just to get out of his expensive condo. He is one of Pastor Joe's regular customers and I have occasionally done this job before.

Let's call this woman Julie. Julie lives in her own house in Takoma Park, little on the chubby side but an attractive blond woman in her mid to late thirties who is a physical therapist by day and does exotic massages and may be more at night. Her specialties are with disabled people and if there are any horny dudes on wheel chairs out there please Call uncle Mad, I will hook you up bro!

We got to Julie's crib around 2:30 am with "Blind Man Dan" and as soon we got there she flashed the living room light and that means "Come on in, the door is unlocked!" I grabbed Dan by his arm and we got in, and when Julie saw me she said, "What the fuck did you do to your hair Mad? I don't like this at all!" It's the first time she saw my new short hair-style, and she is not the only one with that opinion. The only person who likes my hair now is my mother.

I sat in the living room watching TV while they went upstairs to do there thing. It was so ironic that they were showing a re-run episode of COPS on TV, and it was about an anti-prostitution sting operation by Dallas undercovers! The whole time I was there I was getting paranoid of being busted by Takoma Park police with a freakin COPS filming crew in the background.

Sitting there I was so proud of my college education! Not one but two college degrees, my higher learning at work staring at that stupid TV, waiting for a fat blind man at three in the morning while he's getting his balls greased! What a beautiful life man!

Let me count my cash from last night now and please don't forget the homeless,

Mad Cabbie.


Anonymous said...

I think I know blind man dan MC

Anonymous said...

Mad, does Julie do black guy?