Friday, February 08, 2008

$10,000/WEEK DRIVING A CAB!!!

Hi, I am Mad Cabbie! and I am here with an offer of a life time to my wonderful fans!!!

Do you hate your job? Are you doing the same dumb ass shit every day? dealing with that fat ugly boss of yours and slaving for peanuts! Do you want to spend more time with your family only working a few minutes a day while making $1,000, $5,000 even $10,000 per week? Do you want to wipe out your debts and retire by next Christmas? If you answered yes, Mad Cabbie has the answer for you.

I put together "Mad Cabbie's Fast Money Machine Technique" home study guide. All you have to do is study the materials at your own pace and you will be on your way to your financial freedom. This study guide includes a couple of books, six part CD, 8 volume DVDs and a workbook. I will show you a step by step guide on how you to buy your first cab with no money, how to bribe and get your taxi license in a few hours and start making money the same day! The income is unlimited it just depends on how many minutes you want to drive your cab in a day. You will learn everything there is about to know about hacking and making sure that your passengers are happy.

I have done it for years and now I would like to share my secrets with you for this one time offer only. If you don't make $10,000 the first day after you receive my package you can return it for a full refund, In fact I will pay for the return postage and no question asked! You won't be disappointed and satisfaction is guaranteed! Please check out what some of my satisfied clients are saying!

"I live in a small Scottish village where people don't even take cabs at all but I still ordered "Mad Cabbie's Fast Money Machine Technique" and the result was unbelievable, I made $1000 the minute the package arrived! Thank you Mad Cabbie, you are amazing!" Peggy from Scotland.

"When we found out that nobody would hire us to run their political campaign and became jobless, we turned to "Mad Cabbie's Fast Money Machine Technique" to be cab drivers in Washington,DC. We followed the step by step cab driving techniques and in a few days we started making shit load of cash and we moved in to this mansion in Potomac, Maryland....You're the greatest Mad Cabbie!" The retards who ran Rudy Giuliani's presidential campaign.

"I ordered Mad Cabbie's package from America to start training now while I am waiting for these bastards at the American Embassy in India to approve my visa. Mad Cabbie promised to have my cab ready** for work when I touch down at Dulles Airport, and so as soon as I arrive in America I will start counting my American Dollars! God bless you Mad Cabbie!" Amitabh Ragukhanimpalamachchabuchaci from Bombay.

Do I need to say more? Listen, When you call in 1-888-TAKEMYMONEY with in the next 30 minutes and order the package I will cut the price by 90% and for only two payments of $15.95 plus $500 shipping and handling I will send you the package plus the list of hot spots where you can pick up whores for your passengers AND for the first 200 callers I will throw in an address of a huge dominatrix chic who can bitch slap Shaquille O'Neal! and your freaky customers will throw money at you for this service.

What are you waiting for? Are you ready to make $10,000* a week? So get your ass up and dial that number! I know, I know, You may have been ripped off by those stock trade and real estate money making guides that didn't deliver but trust Uncle Mad, this time you got yourself a winner.

Please don't forget the homeless,

Mad Cabbie

*Results may vary, it may take up to ten years to make $10,000 thanks to Mayor Fenty and the new DC fare structure.
**Bribe at the inspection stations extra.

15 comments:

Peggy said...

I also lost 10 pounds and my breath was fresher, teeth whiter!

Kyt Dotson said...

Hahahaha! >.<

Ow, my sides...

june in florida said...

Damn i was rolling my pennies as fast as i could, getting all excited then i realized it was my good friend Mad. Sounded as good a pitch as all the others.I bet you would get takers.

Anonymous said...

That was waay too long for a bullshit post. You must be having quiet nights out there. If THAT'S your sense of humor, stop trying to be funny. We have waited long times between posts for the good stuff. Don't force it Madd.
P.S. You are officially a flip-flopper, I used to think it was a useless political tool until I saw you do it. First it was "why are you complaining, money in your pocket, blah blah blah" and now you are a Fenty Hater. Politics isn't for you Madd, Flip flopper!

Anonymous said...

Fuck You DC Cabs! I am rich, white and you are poor and not.

Mad Cabbie said...

Thanks for letting me use you as a reference Peggy!

Kyt, I checked out some of your post and you got some cool stuff going...outside the box!

Peggy, there is always a sucker out there, you know!

Tall and Well...maybe you are right that this post isn't funny...I will make sure I will keep my day job! BUT you are wrong that I flip-flopped, I supported the mayor's decision to have meters in DC cabs and I still do but my problem is the rate! the way they structured the price when compared to the surrounding area cab fare rates is a joke, the elimination of the extra passenger surcharge and the maximum cap of $18.90 that we are allowed to charge no matter where the passengers get dropped off in the city! What kind of shit is that? Do you honestly think it's fare? Go tell United Airlines that they can't charge over $200 max no matter where they fly in the United States and see what happens! I don't think the mayor did his homework at all on this one...the meter was long overdue, I never liked the zone system and Fenty did right by changing the system but it shouldn't come at the expense of cab driver's basic right to make an honest living by slashing the rates! All I am saying is set the fares uniformly with the surrounding DC metropolitan area counties and shouldn't I let my voice heard Tall and Well?

Mad Cabbie said...

I agree Mr Anonymous, you are rich, white and a fat ass lonely loser with no date reading a cab blog on a Friday night!

Lugosi said...

And I don't even have to send my bank account information to a Nigerian Prince? I'm ordering mine now!!!

Anonymous said...

actually mad, i was reading your bitchy ass blog at 7 am (local time) as i'm europe and reading it again this morning ... sorry you can't afford to go

Anonymous said...

i've seen lots of empty cabs on the street this chilly day. wonder if people are scared off cuz of confusion over the pricing? or cuz everything else costs so doggone much?

if the mayor is so concerned about people's cab fares, the DC government should pay cabbies a subsidy so the cabbies can earn the decent living they deserve, and DC tourists can enjoy the convenience of taxis when they need them. taxis are the third arm of our wonderful public transportation.

DC Cab Rider said...

Forget cabs. I want horse-drawn carriages back! Let's get going with something that can get PETA out onto the streets in a fun protest.

Anonymous said...

Yo Mad sounds good to me!

MJ06

Anonymous said...

if the mayor is so concerned about people's cab fares, the DC government should pay cabbies a subsidy so the cabbies can earn the decent living they deserve, and DC tourists can enjoy the convenience of taxis when they need them. taxis are the third arm of our wonderful public transportation.



Subsidy? out of what? My paycheck? Shiiiiiiit. DC gets enough of my money to fuck away.

Anonymous said...

I don't know about Mad, but there are far too many cab drivers who don't report there income and who won't abide by the laws when going into VA. I am sick of getting charged double what it SHOULD cost to go to VA. Often I just end up getting the bus because all the cab drivers ask for outrageous prices. Once the meters are in place I can just get in the cab and tell them where to go.

This is a case that shows most people without regulation are corrupt. Now that problem will be removed. I think as a show of good will to the cab driver, the mayor should be bumped up 5 dollar. The cabs currently can't charge anything more than 19, so its an extra source of income.

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