Sunday, March 20, 2011

THE PASTOR ALMOST CHECKED OUT

Do you believe my friend Pastor Joe had a heart attack right in-front of me! Yes that cracker ruined my date with some chic I was supposed to hook up with later that night. Instead I had to rush his ass to the hospital and babysit his ass for the last month. We didn't know that he experienced a mild heart attack until we got to the hospital and got him checked out.

I was off that night and I was at my apartment getting pimped up to go out when Pastor Joe took a break and stopped by to chill a little bit because he wasn't feeling well. The minute I saw him I knew something was wrong, he looked weak and so pale I thought Maryiln Manson was at my door. He kept complaining of having a heartburn and refused to go to the hospital but when he started to sweat like crazy, I grabbed his ass and drove him to George Washington Hospital emergency room.

I thought when you have a heart attack you supposed to have a sharp pain at the chest, you moan and you drop to the floor. Pastor didn't have any of that shit and I was surprised when the doctors came out and told me what happened. All that greasy crap that you ate finally paid off motherfucker! Don't worry he will be fine, he just need to adjust to some lifestyle changes and he will be alright. He is way too young to check out but I hope this will be a wake-up call to all of you motherfuckers who eat shit and don't exercise at all.

Sorry for not posting for the last four weeks, I was busy being a nurse to the Pastor because his white trash friends were nowhere to be found. Pastor Joe, next time you have a heart attack please make sure it's in the month of August when the cab business is very slow bitch!

Please don't forget the homeless,

Mad Cabbie.